the least enticing subject line ever

Benjamin Creme

I saw this poster when I was in San Francisco last weekend. I can't think of a better alias than "Benjamin Creme".

How To Make a Scorpio Fall in Love With You

This was super fun — an instructional video I did with my friend Meg. I got to overturn not one but two tables, once in front of small children. And the world gets to see how horribly pale I am. Enjoy! By the way, I'm not actually a Scorpio.

Grown by frogs, for frogs

Every time I go to Rainbow Falafel, they have some absurd brand of tomatoes. Last time, it was "Hawk's Pride" — this time, "Frogmore". 

Self-Defense For Women

Lesson 1: How to stop a man from humping your foot.

too soon?

I found this flyer on the ground a couple days ago. The Minnesota Bridge collapse is a perfect metaphor for a failing marriage. Both can be caused by decades of neglect, slow corrosion, and deterioration of steel structural elements.

Hawk's Pride

That hawk is about to sink his talons into a pretty juicy-looking tomato. I'd be proud too.

Over The Top

My friend Mike Still said that he hoped that "a network photoshops Barack and Hillary armwrestling and shows it tonight with the caption 'Over the Top.'"

I went the easy route and used a poster from the movie.

it Depends

A picture of my bike as I run a few errands around town.
By "errands", I mean shoplifting adult diapers and trying to sell them on the street.

somebody please make this movie

(edit: I should start googling shit before I post -- looks like someone already did a pretty good mashup of these two trailers. I still stand behind my photoshop job though.)